God, it makes me cringe. To see something so miserable. Writhing in it’s own filth. As long as I’ve seen it it’s been so angry. So full of hatred. Hatred for itself but that can’t possibly be contained in one vessel, and so spills over in to everything around it….
Once I had to take a shit really bad when I was out in public. I fucking was not going to be afforded the luxury of a comfortable, familiar toilet before the unstopable happened. I ran in to the nearest facility with a toilet – Mr. Lube. I let loose in that toilet and felt sorry for the microbes that were chillin out on the inside of the toilet bowl before their world was awash with a typhoon of soupy shit. Eating nothing a drinking 8 cups of coffee in one day has this affect on the human body. It takes a lot of toilet paper to clean such a mess off one’s ass. This lead to the filling of the bowl with so much paper, so much that soon was apparently too much for this particular Mr. Lube’s 40 year old plumbing. I stood, with my pants around my ankles as the brown swirling water rose up the bowl and an amazing rate. My instincts suddenly screamed at me that this water level was reaching emergency level. I dove behind the toilet and frantically spun the water valve to hault the rising tide. My efforts were in vain. under the toilet seat the water spilled over the rim of the bowl like mom’s chili pot boiling over. Brown water, like the ocean creeping up the beach spread across the floor. Me, throwing paper towels at the head of the traversing beast. Under the door and in to the lobby of the Mr. Lube, the stinky shit did flow.
Why am I telling this story? oh yeah.
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